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wedding shower AND engagement party ... Is my mom correct in saying it's too much to throw an engagement party and a shower? A: Sadly, yes, I’m going to have to side with mom here. Traditionally, the engagement party isn’t really a big gift-giving occasion, but merely an excuse for everyone to meet and greet the happy couple, and offer their congratulations; the fact that all your relatives arrived bearing goodies is fairly unusual (but very nice of them, obviously). I can see why your mother would feel uncomfortable throwing a shower for you now, since it does seem a bit much to invite the same guests to yet another wedding-related party, and this time one where gifts are traditionally very definitely expected. On top of which, there’s sort of an unofficial rule that it’s not in the best taste for the mother of the bride to throw the bridal shower – the idea being that it looks a little iffy if mom invites all these guests to a party whose main purpose is to deluge her precious little darling girl with gifts galore. If another relative/friend of yours wanted to throw you a shower back in Florida, that’d be another story altogether, but as things stand, I say concede to mom on this point, and enjoy your small, intimate shower with friends in New York. hairdresser
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